Sunday, June 19, 2011

New menu item - zoological curiosities

Time to change gears with a little animal action. Imagine if your local zoo had a roped-off section - velvet curtain, hand stamps, ID checks. These are the beasties that you'd see once your eyes adjusted to the dark - Victorian abominations poached from the most remote corners of the globe, creatures that shatter the rules of pre-war scientific knowledge, a menagerie to shock the most unflappable of moustaches.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Black Market Benny

Black Market Benny was a short-lived character who arrived, like most dealers, to fill a void. His stock in trade, diacritical Latin alphabet letters, proved hugely popular with the immigrant community of Sesame Street, who had been underserved for so long by the show's Anglo-centric programming. It didn't take long, however, for Benny's activities to draw the attention of the League of Republican Mothers, who reported him to the IRS. Benny is eligible for parole in 2014.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Danny Downer

Danny Downer has had a rough time...
Originally, he was brought on the show to teach kids how to deal with depression and despair, but as it turns out he wasn't so sure to deal with it either.
 Another thing, naked muppets? For me, it's in the same category as "wait, so Goofy can talk but Pluto cant?!?"

"Sesame Street Mobster #2"

Monday, June 13, 2011

Failed Sesame Street Character - Ramona the Happy Hooker

Ramona the Happy Hooker

Not a 'failed character' as such, as Ramona lives and works on Sesame Street, but is rarely seen by other characters due to keeping hours that are not 'child-friendly' - a term that sums Ramona up pretty well. Producers of the show asked Ramona to refrain from plying her trade during daylight hours after a live taping of the show went awry, ending in a near-PR disaster for the show and a $10,000 fine for the show's star, Big Bird. Mr. Bird is currently on hiatus.

Although unseen, Ramona is occasionally mentioned by other characters on the show - her daughter, Abby Cadabra, who lives with her in a flophouse at the end of the street - and her pimp, Count von Count.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Mothers lock up your daughters, and sons lock up your mothers, a blog is born!

Prepare for disaster world of the internet, here comes the first Paintbox Buffet topic. 

Failed Sesame Street characters. 

I'll leave this open to interpretation for the most part, but i will say, let's think about who wouldn't be a good role model for the kids. so i bring you...

Boy Scout Bobby

He's a boyscout obviously, or at least he was at one point. He didn't quite make the audition for Sesame Street. You can't really tell what his intentions are, but you CAN tell that you don't him around your kids.

Digital, 1 hour